Princess Katie Returns
Princess Katie Returns is the 56th episode of Unnatural School. Transcript Daniel: That was incredible! Kyle: Yeah. Playing a videogame about a princess who likes cake. Chloe: What kind of princess would demand- (Katie appears) Katie: I want cake! Chloe: You know, you're starting to make us feel like we're your slaves. Katie: I said, I want cake. (cut to Katie eating massive amounts of cake) Chloe: Are you sure you want more? Katie: What did Sydney Otter say? (cut to the School Shop owner's office) Daniel: Somebody's eating massive amounts of cake! School Shop Owner: Not my problem. Daniel: Dammit. (the School Shop Owner proceeds to drink alcohol) (cut back to Chloe) Chloe: Are you sure you want more cake? Katie: Do you want troops to take me away? Chloe: I'm more worried about your blood sugar... Katie: What did you just say? Chloe: Blood sugar levels? You want me to feed you more cake? Katie: That's right! (cut to Kyle in the library) Kyle: Excuse me, I- Librarian: Shhh! Kyle: But I- Librarian: Don't talk so loud. Kyle: Fine. (whispering) I think someone is eating a lot of cake. Librarian: Not my problem. (cut back to Chloe) Katie: I'm so stuffed! More cake! Chloe: You should take a few hours to digest it. Either way, glycogen levels will get you later. Katie: Just feed me more cake! (cut to Jake in the principal's office) Jake: Uhh, hi. We've got a problem. A kid named Katie is eating a ton of cake. Principal: As long as it's healthy, it's not my problem, and it isn't the superintendent's problem. Jake: I heard that it contains 13,000 calories. Principal: That's ridiculous! I mean, how many calories could one single cake have? (Chloe bursts in the principal's office) Chloe: Six hundred thousand and sixty-two calories. That was how much calories are in all the cake Katie ate. Principal: I don't think there's any way to prove this. (cut to a 498-pound Katie smashing into the principal's office) Katie: Uhh... I'm fine? Principal: OK, your current state crosses the line! You get ISS for 360 years! No TV, no movies, no hanging out with friends, no graduation, no calculators, no Khan Academy, no food! (the assistant principal walks in) Asst. Principal: Do you think it's wrong to starve a child without telling the lunch lady? Principal: You're probably right. It's up to the lunch lady to determine whether she deserves to starve, not me. Asst. Principal: I dunno if she'll allow her food in her current state. Principal: Probably. But she still get ISS for sugary cake! (the principal turns to Jake and Chloe) Principal: You better get back to class. (cut to the cafeteria, where Katie is eager to recieve the worst meal in the entire cafeteria) Lunch Lady: No food! Katie: What? Lunch Lady: Teaching you a lesson for eating that sugary cake! Katie: But the principal said that it's your decision to decide whether or not I should be allowed to get some! Lunch Lady: I'm banning you from the cafeteria until you're under 300 pounds, young lady! Katie: Can I at least get a drink? Lunch Lady: There's a water fountain over there. That's the only way you're getting a drink... while I ban you from the lunch line until you're under 300 pounds! (TBA)